I’m really over this God.

God, it’s monday. i’m already late, as usual, so i’ll keep this short. please breathe some life into me today GOd and please help me keep my chin up, witha positive attitude. i hate it here so much GOd, please help me work hard today so that’s one more day accomplished, one mroe day closer to my goal. i pray that i might never forget that i am doing all this for you. i ask for some insight today oh God about the hair. that really scares me. thanks you for loving me and taking care of me.

God, I feel really bad today.

GOd, I’m really scared today. I’m scared that I won’t finish in time, and that I’ll run out of money and energy to be able to accomplish my goals. I’m really stressed out and discouraged.

I pray today, God, please come into this place of fear, uncertainty and stress and calm me, showing me that you do in fact love me and this is all part of your plan somehow.

i can’t see or hear you today, oh God, and I’m really afraid and I wish I could notice You more. I pray God please come into this place today and provide for my soul a feeling of calmness. Please take cre of me today God because I am scared.  The world has gotten  the best of me GOd and I just really need you to renwe me from the inside and give me a better attitude that works for you, in service of you and not for my self and in service of myself. i pray God that you would redeem my selfish me centered attitude.

God, I am dieing today!

please, God have mercy on me today.

 

you are all providing, you have brought me here, thusfar today, you will not fail me or forsake me until all the work is finshed Oh God. 

I thank you , oh God for all you have provided for me and all you have given me. I thank you for my car, my roommate, my church, my church, my film, my apartment, my boyfriend, for my boyfriend God. i thank you for our relationship. 

 

I confess, oh God, that i get scared of my financial future, oh God, i get worried that i will run out of money. i confess oh God that I worry you will not give me any more. 

I ask you, God that you make me selfless in my relationsip. i ask you God that you please show me a glimpse of my financial future because right now i am very, very scared.

I ask you God to please somehow provide for me some financial relief. 

i ask you God to please watch over me in my relationship. please ease the pain and struggle of doing this project when my boyfriend is in such proximity.  i am failing and i am hurting him in the process. 

please give me a thankful herat, an undivided heart, that i may love unconditionally, including my boyfreind when it is late at night and i am angry at him over my film. please please deliver me. i am so stressed out and i an scared father, God. please take care of and provide for me.

 

i love you, but i am so tied up in chains today God.

God, today I am stressed out about money.

God, you are all powerful, my portion for ever. You always take care of me and never leave or forsake me.You know the deepest desires of my heart and always remember me.

I thank you oh God, for having brought me here and having provided for me thusfar.

And I confess, God that I am not a joyful heart, I am not a happy harvest worker, I am not content in You as I should be Oh God. I worry about how I shall survive in this world and I get stressed out and freaked out and try to micromanage. But what is really at hand oh God is that I do not trust in you with blind faith as I need to God. my life is not enough focused on You.

I pray God, please provide for me, I am drowning in worry today. Please God provide a glimpse into my future, about how you wil carry me financially God.  Please provide me some relief financially God because I am scared.

and I pray, could you also tell me where the fucking phone charger cable is God? that’s just annoying.

I still love you. I am thankful for my boyfriend oh God, and I am thankful that he wanted to go to Church with me, and I ask that you reveal Yourself to him God.

I still love you, I still do.

Jackie

i can’t concentrate God!!!!!!

God, PLEASE, today just give me grace!

this is hard and I need to concentrate! today God, please help me focus.

i guess something is always wrong.

and for the record, today God my hair looks great.

God you are all providing. you know the deepest pits of my heart God. and you know that I need love and affection that is worthy of my love.  and you know God that I need a family one day. You haven’t forgotten.

I thank you God for my life, for having saved me and shown me how to grow and seek out a relationship that works for me. because i know that I am beautiful God, i am a beautiful, worthy image of you.

I confess God that i try to take things into my own hands God, that I am lonely and not willing and afraid to find love and acceptance and companionship in You and under your wings God.
I confess God that I am hurting and tangled up in lies from my ex boyfriend God. ex boyfriend. I confess oh GOd that I do not have enough trust and faith that you really are leading me down on the right path to find and marry the right person, the best person for me oh God.

and I ask GOd that you carry me today and always GOd, stay near to me GOd for you are all that can satisfy me. I ask that you gurad me and provide for me a way to not feel alone and rejected but to let it go and bea beautiful and creative for You today, GOd to focus on You alone and why the hell I am doing this for you anyways GOd.

I still love you.

Jackie.

enough already!!!!!

God, I am always always obsessed with what my hair looks like! whatever it looks like- i’m always freked out!

today , i pray to you that you might just show me that i am very beautiful no matter what my fucking hair looks like , that i might get on with my life and stop freking out ALL THE TIME about what my hair looks like.

GOd, you are beautiful, you created everything to be beautiful in an image of you; you created me as beautiful, as a beautiful image of you.

i confess God that i am vain and always obsessed with my appearance God, i am always focusing on the WRONG things.

i thank you GOd for making me  as beautiful as I am God.

and i ask GOd that you might help me to shed this skin to look within and know how beaufitul I am, not because other people think i am beautiful, but just because you think i am beautiful. and I ask Go ths I might focus only on you and on my work today God.

amen, I have work to do right now.

more info about what i want to do

Summary of Position
A Character Modeler/Articulator is responsible for working with Art Designers and Animators to realize
a character in digital form. This includes both shaping the the character’s 3D geometry and the delivery
of a well-designed set of animation controls for manipulating that geometry. The three main disciplines
are modeling, rigging and rig building.

An applicant for a rig position is expected to be very strong in at least 2 of  these areas.

If you have strong artistic skills your two areas of focus might be modeling and rigging. If you are a CG grad
you might be strong in rig construction as you can program and have math skills and you might have a good eye for modeling and motion..

Responsibilities
Modeling covers the spectrum of being able to build humans, robots, cars or toys.

– Using modeling software to sculpt and refine a neutral 3D model to fit the aesthetic needs of Character Designers.
– Designing and maintaining a modeling topology conducive to the storyboarded range of deformations.

Rigging is the process of giving a character controls for movement, therein “articulating” its ranges of motion. We like to think of it as bringing the character to life.

– Working closely with Animators to provide and refine an articulation of the full range of expressions and
body movement needed to support a character’s acting range in the film. A truth to materials/anatomy and animation principles is emphasized, as is patience and a willingness to experiment!
– Creative use of deformers to achieve a specific deformation called for by Animation with a concise set of animation controls.

Rig building is the process of building and supporting rigs that a group of riggers can apply to a set of characters.

– Designing and maintaining Master Rigs that can be re-used as a basis for articulating similar characters, or applying existing Rigs to newly created character sculpts.
– Writing scripts to facilitate workflow improvements in Python or MEL, or working with a programmer to enable them to make such improvements effectively.
– Brainstorming new techniques and ideas for user interfaces, deformation tools, and character specific rigging solutions.
– Troubleshooting technical issues inherent in maintaining a clean file structure and pipelines for both in-house and 3rd party software.
– Having proficiency in a programming language and math is important.

Submission Process

Modeling Reel Guidelines:
On a reel we look for examples of digital sculpting of organic forms such as faces or bodies as well as a variety of works and styles. The best presentations include a turntable showing the final result and a turntable with the mesh so we can evaluate topology. Modeling is an  artistic endeavor so showing examples of drawings or clay sculpts will help. Showing cloth modeling and/or hair modeling will also strengthen a reel.

Rigging Reel Guidelines:

What we look for in a reel is examples of rigging that support the type of character that is being attempted.
A realistic character will have be true to the materials it is made out of. A cartoony character might have Tex Avery touches. Since rigging serves animation showing examples of animation will strengthen the reel.

Rig Building Reel Guidelines:

What we look for in reels are systems that can be used to make faces or bodies. Showing how the controls work and the interface for the animators is important.  Descriptive text for the technical designs/tools shown on the reel should be provided on a separate breakdown sheet included with your reel/resume.

what to remember when applying for the Pixar internship

they asked if I considered myself a computer scientist.

they asked what work i wanted to be shown first.

they asked why i wanted to learn about crowd simualtion?

i need to classify myself as being interested in articulation.

GOD i am having a shitty day! i need a lot of grace today. please GOd give me grace and lay your presence right here. i want to work for you today.

i wanted to dedicate this fast to you God.

before i sit down to eat i want to thank you God for providing for me financially as you have thusfar. i pray that you can speak to me and reveal yourself to me as i am afraid about my financial future today God.

i feel forgotten and hopeless here. i feel depressed that i will be by myself and have no one to comisserate with as Jess graduates. i’m weary and tired of being here HO God and i pray that you seal your word around my heart oh God

for i know the plans i have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. you will call upon me and i will listen to you.
you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all of your heart.

God, oh Lord you are my portion forever, and never shall i want. i confess oh lord that i want all the time. i pray that i can have peace and rest within you. i thank you for putting me here Oh GOd and i pray that i can be fulfilled and taken care of financially in the future oh God because i am very, very scared. i pray that you will not forget or forsake me. and with that in mind i thank you for the time i do have today and i pray that i can use it all on my film.

i’m scared today.